The Key Change

Who may ascend into the hill of the Lord? Or who may stand in His holy place? He who has clean hands and a pure heart (Psalm 24:3-4)

Here and now we are sinners. None of us have clean hands and an innocent heart. In this state, none of us can stand before God and live. This means that somewhere between "here and now" and the moment when the saved will face God, there must be a change in them that will result in them being considered righteous. If we want to be saved, then there must be a change in us.

Lord, who may abide in Your tabernacle? Who may dwell in Your holy hill? He who walks uprightly, and works righteousness, and speaks the truth in his heart (Psalm 15:1-2)

Behaviour as well as thoughts and desires must change. We must have "clean hands and a pure heart", in other words we must “walk uprightly," and speak “the truth in heart". We must regain the condition that Adam and Eve lost because of sin.

Man was originally endowed with noble powers and a well-balanced mind. He was perfect in his being, and in harmony with God. His thoughts were pure, his aims holy. But through disobedience, his powers were perverted, and selfishness took the place of love. His nature became so weakened through transgression that it was impossible for him, in his own strength, to resist the power of evil. He was made captive by Satan, and would have remained so forever had not God specially interposed {SC 17.1}

When should this change occur? Let’s go back to the first two quotes. "Who may ascend into the hill of the Lord? Or who may stand in His holy place?”. This is the future, something to come, while the second part of this statement: "He who has clean hands and a pure heart" concerns the present tense. The same sequence of times is also found in the second quote: "Lord, who may abide in Your tabernacle? Who may dwell in Your holy hill? He who walks uprightly, and works righteousness, and speaks the truth in his heart". Our future depends on who we are today. And one more important conclusion, our future does not depend on what we were. "He who walks uprightly, and works righteousness, and speaks the truth in his heart " experiences God's mercy, because God will remind him "none of the transgressions which he has committed" (Ezekiel 18:22). The requirements of God's justice are fully met when "a wicked man turns from all his sins which he has committed" (Ezechiel 18:21).

One sin caused us to lose our ability to resist the power of evil. We are unable to free ourselves from the slavery of sin alone. In this regard, many of us ask ourselves, "How shall a man be just with God? How shall the sinner be made righteous?" {SC 23.1}. Achieving this state is possible only when the "a wicked man turns from all his sins which he has committed" but none of us can do it. Our sinful nature and our attachment to sin are effectively opposed to our efforts to achieve justice. We do not have enough strength to reject sin on our own, but this does not mean that this change is impossible because "through Christ that we can be brought into harmony with God" {SC 23.1}. The apostle Paul said: "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (Philippians 4:13). This change does not take place in one moment, this change takes time because it consists of several stages, but the most important thing is that it is possible.

At the beginning we have to realize the truth about who we are. Our attachment to sin means that we don't like to think badly about ourselves, but we can think badly about others without problems. "God, I thank You that I am not like other men—extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I possess" (Luke 18:11-12). "I am rich, have become wealthy, and have need of nothing" (Revelation 3:17). Even when we see our own flaws, we think that they are not important and that a small correction of character is enough to make us fair. However, the truth is different, unpleasant and even brutal. "We are all like an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are like filthy rags" (Isaiah 64:6). "There is none righteous, no, not one; there is none who understands; there is none who seeks after God. They have all turned aside; they have together become unprofitable; there is none who does good, no, not one. Their throat is an open tomb; with their tongues they have practiced deceit; the poison of asps is under their lips; whose mouth is full of cursing and bitterness. Their feet are swift to shed blood; destruction and misery are in their ways; and the way of peace they have not known. There is no fear of God before their eyes" (Romans 3:10-18). This is the initial state of every human being, we are and we will remain so as long as we consciously reject God, or despite the impression that we live with God, we want to adapt ourselves to God's law or God's law to our requirements.

The first step to change is acceptance of our true state, acceptance of the truth that we are slaves to sin. Without this awareness, no one can feel the need to change his own life. Each sinner must first understand who he is and then desire the change with all his heart.

When the heart yields to the influence of the Spirit of God, the conscience will be quickened, and the sinner will discern something of the depth and sacredness of God’s holy law (…) he longs to be cleansed and to be restored to communion with Heaven {SC 24.2}

True conversion is not about achieving justice, but about wanting to achieve justice. Conversion is not about abstaining from sin, but about turning away from sin and changing your attitude towards sin. Converted people stop loving sin and begin to hate it, they begin to loathe sin.

Repentance includes sorrow for sin and a turning away from it. We shall not renounce sin unless we see its sinfulness; until we turn away from it in heart, there will be no real change in the life {SC 23.2}

This change is so radical that the Bible compares it to death and rebirth. After this change, man becomes something completely different. A newborn man thinks and feels differently, has different desires and priorities. He no longer loves the sin he was once attached to, now he loves God, from whom he once turned away and whom he would not listen to. Now the Word of God is the most desirable thing for him.

„I will delight myself in Your statutes (…) My soul breaks with longing for Your judgments at all times (…) Your testimonies also are my delight (…) I long for Your precepts” (Psalm 119)

I repeat it again because this is very important that this change takes time. It is a process in which God removes from us what we cannot remove. He does it step by step, and each of these steps consists of a revelation of the truth about what in our character requires a change, and then making this change, but only when we want it. Our consent is necessary for God's action and this is not just a verbal declaration, this consent must be the result of a keen desire to remove this defect that God has revealed to us. It must be the desire of the heart, not just reason. This must be the result of real sorrow for sins.

The prayer of David [Psalm 51] after his fall, illustrates the nature of true sorrow for sin. His repentance was sincere and deep. (…) David saw the enormity of his transgression; he saw the defilement of his soul; he loathed his sin. It was not for pardon only that he prayed, but for purity of heart. He longed for the joy of holiness—to be restored to harmony and communion with God {SC 24.3}

When the sinner begins to see his true condition and at the same time begins to see the beauty of God's character and the magnitude of his love, a desire for change may arise in him that allows him to approach God. This desire is an expression of the love for God, that dwelled in the heart. Because of this love for God sinner can, with God's help, overcome the resistance of his sinful nature and allow God to purify his character.

And as Christ draws them to look upon His cross, to behold Him whom their sins have pierced, the commandment comes home to the conscience. The wickedness of their life, the deep-seated sin of the soul, is revealed to them. They begin to comprehend something of the righteousness of Christ, and exclaim, “What is sin, that it should require such a sacrifice for the redemption of its victim? Was all this love, all this suffering, all this humiliation, demanded, that we might not perish, but have everlasting life?” {SC 27.1}

The sinner may resist this love, may refuse to be drawn to Christ; but if he does not resist he will be drawn to Jesus; a knowledge of the plan of salvation will lead him to the foot of the cross in repentance for his sins, which have caused the sufferings of God’s dear Son. The same divine mind that is working upon the things of nature is speaking to the hearts of men and creating an inexpressible craving for something they have not.  {SC 27.2-28.1}

We all are sinners from birth, but God does not judge us for that. He knows that we come to this world with sinful nature, it is our heritage and we have no influence on it. That is why he tells us that we must be born again, because without transformation into a completely different being, none of us can, or rather is, able to live in the conditions prevailing in God's Kingdom, the kingdom that all Christians are waiting for . God also knows how strong our attachment to sin is and how difficult it is for us to turn our backs on all the things which this world is using to draw us to itself and pull us away from God. God knows this, and because He is a God of love and forcing people to obey is contrary to His nature, He reveals the truth about Himself and thus wants to draw us to Him. He doesn't act like a man who wants to marry a woman and says to her: "Look how good I am to you, you should love me for that", although his behaviour often indicates the opposite. God does not tell us that we must love Him, but by revealing Himself to us, He gives us the opportunity to love Him. Our sinful nature makes us unwilling to accept these revelations because they cause us unpleasant feelings related to the awareness of our imperfections. God understands this, he is God after all, and therefore with great patience he leads us through the process of gradually learning and accepting the truth. Step by step, he frees us from the bondage of sin and lets us feel the taste of true freedom.

Every Christian has felt it at least once. Everyone who saw and felt God with their heart for the first time also felt the difference between their previous life and life in God's presence. In fact, no one immediately felt the full taste of freedom, because the first change is not a total change. This is only the first step to remove all bonds of sin, but the difference is so clear that a person wants to feel this taste all the time. However, quite quickly this first impression, this feeling of joy and happiness, is disturbed by the growing awareness of these defects that still remain in us. The growing awareness of God's love and perfection is associated with the growing awareness of our own imperfection. That is why God not only helps us to know the truth about us, but at the same time reveals to us the truth about Him, so that the sinner does not fall into depression because of his mistakes, but is attracted to Him and let Him make further changes. They are necessary for the sinner to be completely freed from the bondage of sin and ultimately be born again, becoming a new creature. Jesus said, "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest" (Matthew 11:28). He did not say that it is enough to come to Him once, we should do it all the time, every day. Jesus brings rest to those who take His yoke daily and become like Him, humble with their hearts. "If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross [b]daily, and follow Me" (Luke 9:23). Only when we are open to further revelation of the truth about ourselves, when we desire this truth with all our heart and want God to change what He reveals; only then will we feel that His yoke is easy and His burden is light (Matthew 11:30).

Some Christians make the mistake of confusing reaching a certain stage of change with a complete change of character. The feeling of relief at the end of each stage does not change the fact that sinful nature still causes us to be reluctant to continue this path. It is easy to give up the next changes and focus on positive feelings resulting from a partial change of character, but a partial change does not adapt us to God's Kingdom. You cannot be born partly, man is or is not born again, or he is a new creature, or he is not. The new creature is not an modified version of the old, it is a completely new creation. "Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born [a]again, he cannot see the kingdom of God" (John 3:3). So how can you avoid making such a mistake?

One of God's gifts for us is the voice of conscience. It is God's voice that speaks directly to our minds, not so much through speech we understand, but through impressions and feelings. God, through the voice of conscience, informs us in which direction we should go. This helps us make the right decisions. Are we not saying that our conscience is telling us something? The sinfulness of our nature means that we do not like to listen to the voice of our conscience, we do not like when our conscience tries to stop us from doing something that we like to do and to which we are attached. Listening to the voice of conscience is not listening to our desires, and above all, lust. Rather, they try to silence the voice of our conscience, turn off the source of unpleasant thoughts. It is Satan who tries to absorb our minds in various ways so that we do not hear the voice of conscience. So the voice of conscience is one of those safeguards against the errors God has provided us with.

Our common sense, i.e. the ability to think logically, is another safeguard. Logic is also something that comes from God. Contrary to what many Christians think, faith is very logical and there is no room for contradiction. It is thanks to the ability of logical thinking, supported by the help of the Holy Spirit, that we are able to understand the truths that God speaks about in the Bible. The study of the Bible must be done with God's help, and logic is one of the forms of this help. It is thanks to logic that we can see that the Bible does not contradict itself. It is logic that shows us how wonderful the various fragments of the Bible combine, written by different people at different times. And it is logic that God uses to keep us from errors. That is why Satan is trying to influence us so that we lose the ability to think logically. Satan does this to keep in our minds the impression that we are still thinking logically and rationally.

I will give an example illustrating how it works. I was an atheist for many years. As a child, I stopped believing in the existence of God, and my subsequent experience and knowledge only strengthened my belief that God does not exist. God patiently tried to stimulate my mind to think correctly, but I successfully defended myself against it. The longer my resistance continued, the harder it was for me to recognize God's actions. I think that this happens in all of us, regardless of whether someone is a believer or not. I also know that this persistence means that one day the mind will no longer be able to change its mindset to one that allows it to accept the truth.

I think I was very close to this state. However, something happened that destroyed my atheistic worldview. I saw something that I could not explain in any rational and logical way. The only logical explanation was the supernatural action of a higher being that atheists and evolutionists do not believe. God first took advantage of my parents' serious problems and cut me off from the influence of this world. I found myself in a place where I did not have access to the Internet, television, colleagues and many pleasures of this world. It was like Israel's experience in the wilderness. The only thing I could do outside of work was reading books.

Since I always liked books, I started reading those that were in the place where I was. This place was the home of my parents, Seventh-day Adventists, so the home library mainly contained Ellen White books, but I wasn't interested in them. I found several irreligious books, but I read them all very quickly and looking for something new I found the book "History of the Reformation." Although the Reformation is a religious topic, I treated this book as historical and began to read it.

I think that's what God wanted. I began to read about the history of the Reformation and nothing could distract me from it because I was like in a wilderness. The world was unable to give me something that would distract me from this book. And when I learned more and more facts about the activities of Martin Luther, at some point I experienced a kind of revelation. I realized that the only explanation for the fact that Martin Luther did not become another victim of the papacy is the action of supernatural power, such as God. It was a moment when my mind accepted the fact of God's existence.

God used the remnants of logic in my mind to move me and change my attitude towards knowing Him. In a similar way, God works with everyone, giving everyone a chance for repentance and conversion. God does this not only with those who do not believe in Him, but also with those who call themselves Christians, but are really far from God.

There is something in my story that I want to pay attention to. This is my way of thinking when I was an atheist. I have always considered myself a rational and logical man. The truth, however, was that I ignored those thoughts that suggested that some of my views were illogical. I removed all facts from my mind that were contrary to my atheistic philosophy, and despite such moments of doubt, I was convinced that I was right and that my worldview was true. Someone might say that today I also think that my current worldview is true. The difference is that today conscience does not tell me what I have often heard as an atheist. My mind sees no trace of illogicalness in my faith.

This way of thinking, consisting in tolerating illogical views and ignoring feelings that indicate a lack of common sense, is characteristic of anyone who is attached to sin. It doesn't matter if he is an atheist, Catholic or Adventist. As Ellen White wrote, theoretical knowledge of truths does not make us Christians. As people who claim to be Christians, we can also not listen to the voice of conscience and think in a very illogical way, guided by emotions rather than logic. This is exactly what Satan wants and uses all possibilities to deprive us of the ability to listen to what God tells us through conscience and common sense. Satan does this at every stage of a Christian change, and the closer we are to God, the more violent his actions are.

What I wrote about myself is just the beginning of a conversion story that leads to being born again. Even though I believed in God and then got baptized and became a member of the Seventh-day Adventist Church, God still had a lot to do in my life. There was a change in me, but it wasn't being born again. When there was a change in my spiritual life, God showed me the need for further changes, stirring my conscience into action. Although I liked to think about myself that I am a good person now, the truth was completely different. I was still attached to many bad things, and such attachment is an obstacle that prevents me from living in God's presence. Ellen White wrote that "the warfare against self is the greatest battle that was ever fought. The yielding of self, surrendering all to the will of God, requires a struggle; but the soul must submit to God before it can be renewed in holiness" {SC 43.3} I completely agree with this opinion. I know from my own experience that it is much easier to accept certain religious doctrines than the truth about my own faults and addiction to sin. When I believed in God and began to read the Bible, my reason easily accepted some of the Adventist doctrines, for example, I quickly found in the Bible that Saturday is God's Sabbath. However, this new knowledge did not change my habits, I still liked to do things that I knew were not good. Finally, I understood that knowledge understood as knowledge of truths and facts does not make us true Christians, or followers of Jesus. Would Jesus do the same in my place? Would Jesus think the same way I think? Would he feel the same as me? Only someone who lives, thinks and feels in the same way as Jesus “may ascend into the hill of the Lord" and “stand in His holy place", because such person “has clean hands and a pure heart".

Life path

Everyone's life takes place on two levels, physical and spiritual. Physically, we are born in different places and in different environments, more or less friendly, and this determines what we can do. And what about our spiritual life?

We are all born with the same sinful nature, which means that from birth it is easier for us to sin than to live in harmony with God's commandments. No one is born as a good and just man, each of us inherited a sin-corrupt nature. Even if someone has not done something bad all his life, it does not mean that he is fair. The truth about our nature is revealed only when we have a real opportunity to do something wrong. The truth is revealed not so much in the decision as in the thinking process leading to the decision. Jesus said: „whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28). God's standards of justice are much higher than human and concern primarily thoughts and feelings. „I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin my mother conceived me” (Psalm 51:5). „For we have previously charged both Jews and Greeks that they are all under sin. As it is written: “There is none righteous, no, not one; There is none who understands; There is none who seeks after God. They have all turned aside; They have together become unprofitable; There is none who does good, no, not one (…) all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:9-12.23).

Everyone's spiritual life begins in a place that, unless there is a drastic change, does not give him a chance for salvation and eternal life in God's presence. If our future depended only on us, none of us would be saved. However, there is someone who cares more about our salvation than we do. It is God who created us, the one who loved us before we exist. God created us despite knowing that we would fall and turn our backs on Him. Why? Because for God it is not a problem what kind of birth we are. He does not judge us for what we have inherited spiritually from our ancestors. We will be judged for what we have done with the possibilities of changing our state, the possibilities given to us by God. Salvation is not dependent on achieving a particular state or knowledge, but on a desire to change and a willingness to accept and accept with all our heart what we get from God. The salvation of man depends on whether there has been a change in his life and in a spiritual sense he has become a new creature. „For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision avails anything, but a new creation” (Galatians 6:15). Our origin and past does not matter. It doesn't matter what we believed before. The apostle Paul wrote about the Gentiles: „for when Gentiles, who do not have the law, by nature do the things in the law, these, although not having the law, are a law to themselves, who show the work of the law written in their hearts, their conscience also bearing witness, and between themselves their thoughts accusing or else excusing them” (Romans 2:14-15). According to Paul, such pagans are in a better position than those Jews who know the law but do not have it in their hearts. „Indeed you are called a Jew, and rest on the law, and make your boast in God, and know His will, and approve the things that are excellent, being instructed out of the law, and are confident that you yourself are a guide to the blind, a light to those who are in darkness, an instructor of the foolish, a teacher of babes, having the form of knowledge and truth in the law. You, therefore, who teach another, do you not teach yourself? You who preach that a man should not steal, do you steal? You who say, “Do not commit adultery,” do you commit adultery? You who abhor idols, do you rob temples? You who make your boast in the law, do you dishonor God through breaking the law?” (Romans 2:17-23).

The knowledge of God depends on the possibilities. Gentiles have some possibilities, and those who consider themselves God's people have different possibilities. And what is important is not just the possibilities, but what we do with them. According to human criteria, 100 meters run win the one who is the first at the finish line. However, God judges it differently. According to God's criteria, the winner is the one who has used his full possibilities. Someone who could run a hundred meters in 10 seconds, but did this in 11 seconds, even if he was first at the finish, did not win this race at all. But one, who is able do it in 20 seconds, did this in 20 seconds, is the winner. By the way, only one man can win in human competitions, in God’s one everyone can be a winner. It all depends on whether a person has used the opportunities given to him. „For everyone to whom much is given, from him much will be required; and to whom much has been committed, of him they will ask the more” (Luke 12:48).

The need for spiritual change is the result of what happened in the garden of Eden. When God created Adam and Eve, they needed no change, only development and deepening of their relationship with God. „Man was originally endowed with noble powers and a well-balanced mind. He was perfect in his being, and in harmony with God. His thoughts were pure, his aims holy. But through disobedience, his powers were perverted, and selfishness took the place of love. His nature became so weakened through transgression that it was impossible for him, in his own strength, to resist the power of evil. He was made captive by Satan, and would have remained so forever had not God specially interposed” (EGW, SC 17.1). The purpose of the change is to restore the original state of balance of mind and harmony with God. Before sin „man held joyful communion with Him “in whom are hid all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.” (Colossians 2:3). But after his sin, he could no longer find joy in holiness, and he sought to hide from the presence of God. Such is still the condition of the unrenewed heart. It is not in harmony with God, and finds no joy in communion with Him. The sinner could not be happy in God’s presence; he would shrink from the companionship of holy beings. Could he be permitted to enter heaven, it would have no joy for him. The spirit of unselfish love that reigns there—every heart responding to the heart of Infinite Love—would touch no answering chord in his soul. His thoughts, his interests, his motives, would be alien to those that actuate the sinless dwellers there” (EGW, SC 17.2). As long as our thoughts, interests and motives do not change, we will not fit into God's reality, and thus we will not be able to be saved. This will not be the result of God's arbitrary decision, but our choice. Without a change of hearts and characters, we simply do not want to live in such conditions as prevail in the Kingdom of Heaven, even if we say that it is not.

So this change is necessary, but it is beyond our capabilities. „It is impossible for us, of ourselves, to escape from the pit of sin in which we are sunken. Our hearts are evil, and we cannot change them (…) Education, culture, the exercise of the will, human effort, all have their proper sphere, but here they are powerless. They may produce an outward correctness of behavior, but they cannot change the heart; they cannot purify the springs of life. There must be a power working from within, a new life from above” (EGW, DC 18.1). Fortunately, „with men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible” (Matthew 19:26). Not only can God change us, but this is his ardent desire. There is only one condition, we must allow it. Only so much, but also so much, because our attachment to what is bad is beyond our imagination. One of our faults is that we like to think about ourselves well. „ I am rich, have become wealthy, and have need of nothing”. However, Jesus tells everyone who thinks this: „you are wretched, miserable, poor, blind, and naked” (Revelation 3:17). Our faults mean that we don't want to let our consciousness think that our spiritual condition is hopeless. And it is necessary for this state to change. The first step is to realize the truth about yourself. God helps us in this by revealing this truth to us step by step. God reveals two truths to us, about us and about Himself. He reveals our faults to us so that through comparison we can see how low we have fallen. He reveals also to us the depth of his love for us, fallen people, allows us to see how much he loves us and that he is ready to sacrifice everything for us, and the awareness of his love awakens in us the hope and desire to live next to such a wonderful and loving God. This desire is what is necessary for us to overcome the resistance of our sinful nature and allow God to begin to change our characters and hearts.

How is it with the possibilities that God gives us that our spiritual life may change? The Bible discusses this issue with the example of many people. One of them was Jacob, son of Isaac. Jacob was a good child and grew up a good man, but he had some disadvantages that led him to use a lie to get what God had once promised him. Was Jacob a bad man? Certainly not. He tried to be faithful and obedient to God, he also tried to live honestly. However, in moments of trial, when he had the opportunity to choose between trust and loyalty to God and deception, he chose the second option. And yet God did not abandon Jacob. On various occasions, he patiently revealed the truth to him, giving Jacob a chance to repent and convert. Intellectual acceptance of certain dogmas is not true faith. „The greatest deception of the human mind in Christ’s day was that a mere assent to the truth constitutes righteousness. In all human experience a theoretical knowledge of the truth has been proved to be insufficient for the saving of the soul. It does not bring forth the fruits of righteousness (…) The same danger still exists. Many take it for granted that they are Christians, simply because they subscribe to certain theological tenets. But they have not brought the truth into practical life. They have not believed and loved it, therefore they have not received the power and grace that come through sanctification of the truth. Men may profess faith in the truth; but if it does not make them sincere, kind, patient, forbearing, heavenly-minded, it is a curse to its possessors, and through their influence it is a curse to the world” (DA 309.2-3). Jacob believed in God, but this faith did not change his character, he did not remove his attachment to the wrong. Jacob believed, but he didn’t unconditionally trust God. In the moments of trial he trusted himself, not God. However, the moment came when Jacob broke the resistance of his sinful nature, humbled himself before God, confessed all his weaknesses, asked for help and received it. He stopped trusting himself and unconditionally trusted God. And how was Abraham? The story of him begins when Abraham was seventy-five years old. He believed in God and heard God's voice, he also obeyed God. However, at the time of trial, he did not trust the Creator, but trusted himself. When did he fully trust in God? When he was over a hundred years old and God tested him on Mount Moria. Another example is the apostle Paul. How many years God patiently revealed the truth to him, and Paul, as Saul, would not accept it? And what about King David?

There are also examples in the Bible of people who once did not believe in God, but they used the opportunities given to them and finally truly believed in Him. They believed and trusted Him. Such a person was Rachab from Jericho. Such a man was Naaman, leader of the army of the king of Assyria. They were also Nebuchadnezzar, king of Babylon, Simon of Cyrene and a Greek woman whose daughter was possessed by demon. They were people who were once pagans, but when God revealed the truth about himself to them, they believed in Him and it changed their lives. It was the same with me. God revealed himself to me for most of my life, but I didn't even want to accept that He existed. I was an atheist for many years. However, God patiently repeated his attempts to reach my heart and I finally understood that atheism is only a false religion. I understood that God exists, but this was only the beginning. My life is proof of what Ellen White wrote about the greatest error of human minds in the days of Christ. I also believed for quite a long time that it is enough to believe in the existence of God and it is enough to accept certain biblical truths to become a Christian and to be saved. However, this is not true. Belief in the existence of God is only a change of views about the universe and does not cause this change, which is a condition of salvation, but it is necessary to gain trust in God, that is, to truly believe in Him.

How many Christians today are convinced that they are truly Christ's disciples? Are they right? The Bible tells us that, unfortunately, not. „Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven. 22Many will say to Me in that day, ‘Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?’ 23And then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness” (Matthew 7:21-23). And since Jesus warns us that most Christians make a fatal mistake, maybe it is worth checking if we are really Christians and if the change that is necessary for salvation has taken place in us? This change concerns our hearts. Without this change, our thoughts, interests and motives are different from those of the sinless inhabitants of heaven. Without this change, there are in our lives these "works of the flesh", that the apostle Paul described in his letter to the Galatians. Without this change, what Paul has called the fruit of the Spirit is not present in us. I know that many of us like to read this passage in a special way. It consists in the fact that we are content with revealing some ingredients of the fruit of the Spirit in our lives, and at the same time we believe that some works of flesh, appearing from time to time, are irrelevant. However, the truth is different. The appearance of even one work of flesh indicates that your life does not give the fruit of the Spirit, and what seems to be the fruit to us is only a counterfeit. "A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit" (Matthew 7:18). This condition does not disqualify us as Christians, but testifies that God has not yet finished his work, and we are still attached to something that does not come from God.

Dear brothers and sisters. Let's stop judging ourselves based on what we do. It is not deeds that determine who we are, but our motivation. Good deeds are important, but more important is why we do all kinds of good things. Bad motivation means that what seems to be good is worthless to the one who does it. It doesn't matter that we are in the church every Sabbath (apart from the circumstances we have now). It doesn't matter that we bring tithes, we give offerings, and participate in evangelistic work. It does not matter that we help the poor and the sick, if these activities are not the result of love for God and for our neighbours. Our characters determine why we do something. And the truth about our characters is revealed in these moments when we make decisions to be obedient to God or not. Even in small matters.

Because of how we are born, none of us can be saved. The only way to salvation is through a change of heart and character, and everyone has a chance for such a change. God does everything to make us desire to become a new creature, free from vices and filled with God's love. For this to happen, we must begin to use the opportunities that God gives us. We must begin to respond to God's call and allow Him to act in us. Let everyone who has not yet come on this path find it as soon as possible, and those who are already on it, with God's help persevere on it to the end.

Hebrew Slave

“If you buy a Hebrew servant, he shall serve six years; and in the seventh he shall go out free and pay nothing. If he comes in by himself, he shall go out by himself; if he comes in married, then his wife shall go out with him. If his master has given him a wife, and she has borne him sons or daughters, the wife and her children shall be her master’s, and he shall go out by himself. But if the servant plainly says, ‘I love my master, my wife, and my children; I will not go out free,’ then his master shall bring him to the judges. He shall also bring him to the door, or to the doorpost, and his master shall pierce his ear with an awl; and he shall serve him forever” (Exodus 21:2-6)

God, through Moses, spoke these words to Israel. Where and when? This took place under Mount Sinai and it was the beginning of Israel's forty-year stay in the desert. First, " God spoke all these words, saying: “I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage" (Exodus 20:1-2) and personally gave the people the content of the ten commandments. And when “all the people witnessed the thunderings, the lightning flashes, the sound of the trumpet, and the mountain smoking; and when the people saw it, they trembled and stood afar off. Then they said to Moses, ‘You speak with us, and we will hear; but let not God speak with us, lest we die’". From then on, God spoke only through Moses, giving his people various laws and principles, the observance of which was to direct Israel to the right way of life. Let us pay attention to what matters God discussed at the beginning, because usually the most important matters are discussed at the beginning. What did God begin with? First, referring to the first and second commandments, he spoke about the altar and sacrifices, and then passed on the laws concerning Hebrew slaves. Was it just a special way of treating Hebrew slaves, or was God willing to give something more to His people?

Let's look at this scene from a broader perspective. Three months earlier, Israel left Egypt. The Israelites ceased being slaves and became free people. When they lived in Egypt, they were not only slaves, but they didn't really believe in God. True faith is not only recognition of God's existence, but above all, trust in God and obedience to God. True faith is love of God, and most Jews did not have that love. This is demonstrated by the way they received Moses. Admittedly, "the people believed; and when they heard that the Lord had visited the children of Israel and that He had looked on their affliction, then they bowed their heads and worshiped", but when problems arose, the same Jews who believed and worshiped God told Moses: "Let the Lord look on you and judge, because you have made [b]us abhorrent in the sight of Pharaoh and in the sight of his servants, to put a sword in their hand to kill us". True faith is not revealed in keeping certain ceremonies or theological truths, but in trusting in God when faith is tested. It is the difficulties, that we go through, that reveal the truth about our faith. When Moses came to Egypt, the Jews did not have such faith. The first three plagues affected both Egyptians and Jews, which means that, despite their declaration of faith in the One God, in God's eyes there was no difference between Israelites and Egyptians. The departure from Egypt was the end of the period of captivity, but it was also the entry onto the road leading to true freedom. The Israelites stopped being slaves, but they didn't feel like free people at all. It suited them that they did not have to work as slaves, but they did not feel the joy of living according to God's principles. Jesus said: "Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light" (Matthew 11: 29-30). They did not have love for God, which makes "that we keep His commandments, and His commandments are not burdensome" (1 John 5: 3). And therefore for many of them the yoke of Egyptian slavery was lighter and nicer than the one they received through Moses.

When God gave Israel the laws related to Hebrew slaves, He showed them the path each of them had to follow. After leaving Egypt, they were like slaves in a spiritual sense. They regained physical freedom but did not do what they wanted. Their desires did not comply with God's law. Obeying God's law was for them the same as for a slave to follow the master's instructions. Changing their attitude required going a long way, the beginning of which was leaving Egypt, crossing the Red Sea and Mount Sinai. There was freedom at the end of this road. "If you buy a Hebrew servant, he shall serve six years; and in the seventh he shall go out free and pay nothing". These six years are a symbol of this period of believer’s life in which he wants to live according to God's law, but at the same time he feels it as a heavy and unpleasant yoke. It is a time that God gives to everyone who has accepted Him as God and Creator, that such a man would know God, trust Him and desire to be free from the slavery of sin. This time is a time of self-struggle, a time of struggle between sinful nature and love for God. And this time at some point ends, the struggle with yourself ends. And there are only two ending options, both are related to freedom.

„If you buy a Hebrew servant, he shall serve six years; and in the seventh he shall go out free and pay nothing”. For some time, God helps believers know the truth, but we often reject these truths. But God still does. He knows that because of our sinful nature, we need a long time to accept these truths. However, rejecting one truth makes the next revelation more difficult to accept. And thus, one day we come to a place from which there is no return. We consciously reject obedience to God, which we feel as slavery, and choose freedom based on our own rules, preferences and desires. God allows us to choose this kind of freedom, although He would like us to choose another one.

„But if the servant plainly says, ‘I love my master, my wife, and my children; I will not go out free,’ then his master shall bring him to the judges. He shall also bring him to the door, or to the doorpost, and his master shall pierce his ear with an awl; and he shall serve him forever”. True freedom is a state in which a person wants to live according to God's principles, and such a life is not only associated with slave obedience, but is a source of constant joy and happiness. The Hebrew slave who gave up his freedom, stayed in his master's house and did exactly the same as before, but he no longer felt like a slave. He met his master and loved him so much that he could not imagine another life. A very important element of this voluntary slavery, or true freedom, is the bond between him and his wife and children. Once upon a time, Jesus said: "Here are My mother and My brothers! For whoever does the will of My Father in heaven is My brother and sister and mother" (Matthew 12:49-50). He who loves God cannot hate people or despise them. Love for God is inseparable from love for people. The Hebrew slave who feels associated with his wife and children is a symbol of a believer who feels associated with his brothers and sisters in Christ. The Hebrew slave also loves others, but love for someone who does not want to be a Hebrew slave will not make him leave his Lord's house. "He who loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me" (Matthew 10:37). Unfortunately, life in this world is sometimes associated with painful choices, when someone we love does not want to go with us to God. One who truly loves God will never get out of this way, even when those whom he loves in various ways influence him to do so.

Our biggest problem is sin and our addiction to sin. When Jesus told the Jews that they would know the truth and this truth makes them free, he spoke of deliverance from the slavery of sin. When God gave Israel His law, He said in the first sentence that he released them from the house of slavery. At the time, these words were literal, but also symbolic, because God also spoke about the slavery of sin. And God's next words related to slavery are those in which he gave the Israelites rights related to Hebrew slaves. These words also had and still have both literal and symbolic meanings. We are Hebrew slaves. I think each of us remembers such moments when as a believer he felt some of his Christian duties as a kind of slavery. This feeling is associated with attachment to sin and disappears when every form of sin becomes something disgusting to us. Then and only then do we become voluntary Hebrew slaves, people loyal to God in every aspect of life. As perfectly obedient slaves of God, we only do what He pleases. We are like people who do not have their own will but surrender to God's will in everything, but the beauty of this kind of bondage is that we do not lose our free will. We can and are able to make decisions independently, but our will, our desires and aspirations are exactly the same as God has. No one must force himself to do what he desires, and the desires of every man who believes in God are God's desires. The basis for such voluntary slavery is love for God.

How do we feel, people who consider themselves Christians, whether as slaves who must follow the instructions of their Lord, or as voluntary slaves who desire to follow these instructions?

Prayer

In his book "One miracle after another" Pavel Goia described a very interesting event that took place when he began his studies. Pavel also talked about this during some of his lectures that can be found on the Internet, so I will just say that it was at a time when Romania was still a communist country, and Saturday was a normal day of work and study, also at universities. 

As an Adventist, Pavel did not take part in Saturday classes, but after some time he had to make an important decision. Either he will start going to Saturday classes or he will be thrown out of college and deprived of the right to resume it. In other words, he had two options to choose from, to remain loyal to God and, as a consequence, lose the chance to get a higher education, or start attending classes on Saturdays, and thus not consciously abide by God's Sabbath. For some time, Pavel tried to find a third option, which would be a compromise between loyalty to God and adapting to the requirements of the university. He wanted to be a good Adventist and a good student at the same time. He did not understand that true faith is readiness and willingness to sacrifice everything to remain faithful to the God you love. He prayed to God for help, but God did not answer him as he expected. At this point, Pavel did not realize that there was a fight going on in his mind because there was a conflict between his two life priorities. 

As an Adventist, he had theoretical knowledge of God's requirements and wanted to fulfil them, but he wanted to graduate even more. He was not ready to give up his education and remain faithful to God. What was he praying to God for then? That God would miraculously make him able to continue his studies. After a while, Pavel realized that he was more concerned about education than about God. Pavel understood that the truth of our faith is revealed during trials, during which we must choose between obedience and disobedience. The theoretical knowledge of the Scriptures or Adventist doctrines in no way shows that we are Adventists. We are Adventists only when we are ready to sacrifice everything in the name of loyalty to God. What's more, readiness for this sacrifice should be our desire, not the result of a rational decision. Obedient to God is the one who wants to be obedient, not the one who thinks it is his duty and, in a way, forces himself to obey. 

When Pavel understood this, when he realized that he was a weak man, too much attached to certain worldly affairs and not enough attached to God, then he realized that in this world love for God always leads to such conflicts, because this world does everything to move us away from God. This world does everything to make us appreciate what satisfies our egoistic ambitions more than what comes from God. Pavel realized that when he tried to save his education, he disregarded what Jesus Christ did, because Jesus remained faithful to God's law even in the face of death. This made Pavel pray differently. He was ready to give up everything to God, including his education, to witness about God's glory in every aspect of his life. He understood Jesus' sacrifice better, and it made him look at life from a different perspective. What previously seemed so important to him turned out to be of little importance, and the most important priority became obedience to God and serving Him with all his heart. Pavel began to pray that God would use him to reveal the Truth to other people, regardless of what happen with him. 

And what do we pray for when we have problems or need to make an important decision? What are we guided by?

Pavel Goia wanted to graduate, he wanted to base his future on education. And when it turned out that his faith could be an obstacle to his education, he began to ask God that he could continue his studies. 

When we find ourselves in a similar situation, when we try to get a better job or our child has an important exam, what are we praying for? Is it not that God would help us get this job and let our child pass this important exam? Does it look like the prayer "my will be done" instead of "Your will be done"? What if God has a different plan for us and wants us to go in a different direction?

One day King David had to make a very important decision. His son Absalom at first planned and then began to implement the plan to gain power in Israel. He tricked the kindness of many Jews, and when he revealed that he wanted to become king of Israel, many supported him. David found himself in a difficult situation. He knew that God had chosen him to be king of Israel, he remembered how often God helped him and how much God's blessing he received. He also knew that Absalom was not chosen by God. As a result, he could decide to fight his own son, because although many Israelites joined Absalom, many still supported David. The nation was divided, and the country was one step away from the civil war. However, David wanted to avoid fighting and preferred to leave Jerusalem and lose the throne, rather than allow bloodshed.

David's decision was also based on the fact that he was aware that it was his sin that led to this crisis. When he decided to have an affair with Bathsheba in the past, he was not aware of its consequences. He remembered that when he saw Bathsheba bathing and wanted her, his conscience told him not to succumb to temptation and not do something that was against God's will, but David did not listen to the voice of his conscience. 

Now he did not want to make the same mistake and above all he wanted to know God's will. He knew that until he began fighting Absalom, various solutions to the crisis were possible, and he preferred to withdraw from Jerusalem. Thanks to this, he had time to pray and learn God's will. David said: "If I find favor in the eyes of the Lord, He will bring me back and show me both it and His dwelling place. But if He says thus: ‘I have no delight in you,’ here I am, let Him do to me as seems good to Him" (2 Samuel 15: 25-26). David did not trust himself and therefore did not want to make decisions alone. He trusted God and knew that the best way was to do what God wanted, even if it would end badly for him. He did not want to take care of himself and his power, but above all he wanted to obey God. For the glory of the Creator, he was ready to give away not only power, but also life. Just like Moses who said to God, "These people have committed a great sin, and have made for themselves a god of gold! Yet now, if You will forgive their sin—but if not, I pray, blot me out of Your book which You have written" (Exodus 32: 31-32). David, just like Moses, was more concerned about God's glory and was ready to give his life for that purpose.

David did not leave Jerusalem as a great commander, who gives way to a too strong enemy, but as a penitent. He did not make strategic decisions, but above all he humbled himself before God. „David went up by the Ascent of the Mount of Olives, and wept as he went up; and he had his head covered and went barefoot. And all the people who were with him covered their heads and went up, weeping as they went up” (2 Samuel 15:30). 

There was another important reason for David's decision. Although Absalom wanted to kill him, David still loved his son and wanted to do everything what was possible to save him. Therefore, when there was a direct fight with Absalom's troops, David commanded Joab, Abishai and Ittai: "Deal gently for my sake with the young man Absalom" (2 Samuel 18:5). And when Joab killed Absalom against this order, David's despair was tremendous. "O my son Absalom—my son, my son Absalom—if only I had died in your place! O Absalom my son, my son" (2 Samuel 18:33).

Studying the history of the conflict between Absalom and David is another opportunity to get to know God better and to understand the teachings of the Bible. This conflict is a symbol of the conflict between God and Satan. God allowed Lucifer to operate in heaven for some time, but when Lucifer's rebellion became more and more visible, God removed Lucifer and his followers from heaven, separating himself from his enemies. God did not allow war in heaven, just as David did not allow war in Jerusalem. God gave time to those who were deceived by Satan and, revealing the truth to them, wanted to draw their hearts to Him. David did the same, and thanks to this many of those who previously supported Absalom again joined David. However, not everyone did it guided by the heart, many joined David for selfish reasons. However, for God this form of obedience is an abomination, and therefore many of these people will one day hear: "I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!" (Mt 7.23). The same happened with Joab, the son of Zeruiah, who had been with David for many years, but before his death David instructed Solomon to kill him. Joab suffered the consequences of his attachment to evil and it did not help him that he was close to David for many years. Does this not show us, people living in the times of the end, that our fate is not determined by our actions, but what we have in our hearts? We may consider ourselves believers, we may belong to the right church and know God's law and doctrines of faith, we can also do many good things, but it is the content of our heart and our priorities that determine our future. "Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven" (Mt 7,21).

In turn, David's despair after Absalom's death is a symbol of the despair which God will feel when Satan will die. Lucifer was God's most perfect creature, and despite falling and becoming Satan, God never stopped loving him. God's love did not end when Lucifer sealed his fate with his decisions. God loves all his creatures, even those who fell very low. God's hatred is not about his creatures but about sin. David revealed this truth by doing everything to save Absalom, and then despairing after his death. Absalom's death is the proof that God's love cannot save a sinner unless he turns away from all his sins. And God does everything to make it happen, He does everything so that every sinner can convert and reject the evil with all his heart. God wants every sinner to love Him, because only love for God cleanses our hearts and removing egoism from them makes our characters like God's. Only by loving God we can ask Him only for what is good and right, because we want the same thing that our God wants.

Each of us prays to God and asks Him for different things. And I am convinced that many of us have good intentions and think of their requests as something good. However, do we have the right evaluation criteria? When we ask God to help our child pass an important exam, how can we be sure that this is what God wants? Every parent wants their child to have the best life, not to suffer from scarcity, to get the best education and then to do the best job. Any failure of a child is a source of parental suffering. However, such an assessment of what is good for a child is based on human criteria and does not consider that sometimes suffering, which is always the result of Satan's actions, is used by God to reveal the truth. When many Christians were killed because of their faith, their death and their shed blood were what attracted many people to God. It was the readiness of Christians to sacrifice their lives that amazed many unbelievers, who were later converted and increased the number of people faithful to God. 

Of course, this doesn't mean that God wants us to suffer, He doesn't want it, that's what Satan wants. However, God's protection and blessings do not mean that God provides us, here and now, with a trouble-free life, but that God does everything to change us and adapt us to the conditions of life in His Kingdom. And because of our sinful nature, this change is often possible only through suffering, ours or other people's. That is why Jesus suffered and died on the cross. Therefore God has allowed the death of many who will take part in the resurrection of the righteous. 

As parents, we should think more about our children's future lives and do everything to save them. As sinners, and yet we are all sinners, we should think about salvation rather than worldly matters, and we should think about contributing to the salvation of others rather than thinking about our own salvation. When we live like that, all our prayers will be answered because their main purpose will be "Thy will be done".

Did Balaam obey God?

Obedience is one of the controversial topics related to faith. On the one hand, the majority of Christians believe that obedience is important, but on the other, they understand it in different, sometimes contradictory, ways.

There are some Christians for whom obedience to God is not directly related to keeping God's commandments. They believe that God changed his law and thus changed the requirements that must be met for man to be saved.

There are also Christians who believe that keeping the commandments is important, but they are convinced that we do not need to worry about our disobedience, because someday God will change us so that the problem of disobedience will disappear. Failure to keep the commandments here and now is not a problem.

From a logical point of view, it is obvious that only one view can be true, but I do not want to deal now with the relationship between obedience and God's law, but on obedience itself. What is obedience? It is surrendering to someone's will. For example, Wikipedia gives this definition of obedience:

„Obedience, in human behavior, is a form of ‘social influence in which a person yields to explicit instructions or orders from an authority figure’” (Wikipedia).

Obedience to God is therefore the submission of man to God's instructions and orders. What exactly is this submission? For anyone who knows something about the history of Israel, obedience is not about keeping the external signs of obeying God's commands. Jesus explained this in a sermon upstairs, but I want to discuss it on another example.

As Israel approached the Promised Land after forty years in the desert, the inhabitants of Canaan and the surrounding area began to feel more and more fear. This fear is the natural reaction of sinful nature when God's glory is revealed. Such fear was felt by the Israelites themselves, when God revealed their presence on Mount Horeb to them, the same fear will be felt in the future by those who will call to the mountains and rocks: "Fall on us and hide us from the face of Him who sits on the throne and from the wrath of the Lamb! For the great day of His wrath has come, and who is able to stand?" (Rev 6: 16-17). The inhabitants of Jericho felt the same fear, and Rahab confirmed this when she spoke to two Israeli spies (Joshua 2). These people sensed the impending danger and were aware that they were opposed to God, but it is far more important that they did not want to submit to God and tried to save their lives in various ways. Everyone has a special gift from God, which is conscience. It is the voice of conscience that warns us of the danger of making the wrong decision. The voice of conscience is the voice of God who says, "Don't do it," or suggests which decision is right. It was through the voice of conscience that God warned Balak, king of Moab, giving him a chance to save not so much life as salvation. However, Balak did not want to do what his conscience told him. He was too attached to his life and therefore tried to find another way out.

If Balak were to rationally assess the whole situation, it would be logical to conclude that it is better to run away before Israel than to lose life. However, when a person does not listen to the voice of conscience, he begins to lose the ability to think logically, and in such a state he cannot make rational decisions. Balak decided to use the prophet to weaken and then defeat Israel. So he sent messengers to Balaam, who he knew was God's prophet. With the promise of a generous payment, he wanted to convince Balaam to come and curse Israel. And this point begins this part of this story that talks about obedience.

When the messengers came to Balaam and presented to him King Balak's offer, the prophet replied to them: "Lodge here tonight, and I will bring back word to you, as the Lord speaks to me" (Numbers 22:8). At night, God came to talk to Bileam and finally told him: “You shall not go with them; you shall not curse the people, for they are blessed”. According to what he heard, in the morning Balaam told the messengers: “Go back to your land, for the Lord has refused to give me permission to go with you”. They returned to Balak, but the king did not change his mind and sent a larger group of messengers with the same task. They again tried to persuade the prophet to go to Moab. Balaam replied to them, “Though Balak were to give me his house full of silver and gold, I could not go beyond the word of the Lord my God, to do less or more. Now therefore, please, you also stay here tonight, that I may know what more the Lord will say to me”. God again came at night to the prophet and told him: “If the men come to call you, rise and go with them; but only the word which I speak to you—that you shall do”. In the morning Balaam got up and went with the princes of Moab.

Was Balaam obeying God until then? The first time God told Balaam not to go to Moab and the prophet would stay home. The second time God told Balaam to go with the messengers, but to do what God would tell him. And Balaam went on a trip to Moab. Did he do what God told him to do? If so, why, when “Balaam rose in the morning, saddled his donkey, and went with the princes of Moab”, “God’s anger was aroused because he went”? Was God angry at Balaam because the prophet obeyed Him? I think no one who beliefs agree with this conclusion. In that case, how did Balaam not obey God? Let's take a closer look at what God said to Balaam. “Rise and go with them; but only the word which I speak to you—that you shall do". There are two commands in this sentence. First, "rise and go with them", and second one, "only the word which I speak to you—that you shall do "? All depends on how we understand the word "do". If we think that deed is just an external manifestation of our activity, then we should state that Balaam also did the second command, because God told him "stand up and go". However, this definition of deed is not biblically correct, because Jesus in the sermon on the mount explained that physical activity is closely related to motivation, physical activity is the result of our thoughts, feelings, desires and what is important to us. For God deed is not only physical action, but much more motivation, because God knows our hearts and knows why we do something. Balaam literally fulfill God's command, but his motivation was not correct. God told him to do only what He commanded, but Balaam was more interested in the reward promised by Balak than not to curse the blessed people. The desire to receive the promised prize was so great that Balaam could not see the angel of the Lord standing on his way. This is strange because Balaam was a prophet of God. God not only met with him, but also talked to him. Who among us has such a relationship with God as Balaam? Who among us talks to the Creator like a Madian prophet? Who among us hears and understands God's voice?

Balaam was God's prophet, during this short story in Numbers 22-24 he spoke to God twice and received four prophecies. I think that not only today, but also in the past, this has not happened very often. And yet, despite such good contact with God, Bileam fell. At the most important moment, he was tempted and chose to love the treasures of this world. Because God would not let him curse Israel, he chose another way to win the prize. He presented Balak a plan to weaken Israel with the help of Moab women. The Israelites were strong not because of their numbers, but because of their obedience. The people who had just defeated Sidon, the king of Amor, and Og, king of Bashan, were not the same people who had left Egypt forty years earlier. Of the more than half a million men who left Egypt, only a few remained. Most Israelites grew up in the desert. They believed in God, but their faith had not yet been seriously tested. They did not know the "charms" of earthly life, their world was a desert, they were just approaching a land where life looked completely different to life on desert. The time of a serious trial for the Israelites was approaching, and this trial was the result of a plan developed by Balaam. The same Israelites, who could not be overcome by force, turned into weak men because of the action of special weapon, the mysterious charm of Moab women who were completely unlike Israeli women. Tough and fearless warriors turned out to be wax in the hands of seemingly weak women. And a man who was God's prophet led to it.

Did Balaam obey God? True obedience to God is not only physical submission to commands, but first and foremost the willingness to obey. This desire to live in accordance with all that God says is a state in which there is no room for forcing himself to follow orders, there is no place for the contradiction between what a person does and what he wants to do. It is a state of perfect harmony between the body and spirit of man and God. Such a man accepts by faith all the new truths revealed to him by God, especially those that concern him and show him what must be changed in his life. Because sinful nature does not want to accept such truths, the voice of conscience is activated, which God tries to convince the sinner. Balaam heard the voice but did not listen. And the more often we disregard the voice of conscience, the less it is heard. This is what happened with Balaam, and this is also what happens with everyone who follows the same path. And at the end of this path is death. „And they warred against the Midianites, just as the Lord commanded Moses, and they killed all the males. They killed the kings of Midian with the rest of those who were killed—Evi, Rekem, Zur, Hur, and Reba, the five kings of Midian. Balaam the son of Beor they also killed with the sword” (Numbers 31:7-8).

When we consider obedience, we must remember about its two important aspects. Firstly, what is obedience, and secondly, how can you become obedient. I have already written about the first, now I will deal with the second. How can you become obedient?

It turns out that this question is more difficult than the first. Each of us had moments in life when you wanted to change something. Usually we know what we want to change in such situations, but finding a way to achieve this change is not so easy. And when we find a way, it is often not easy, because it requires commitment and consistency. Life shows that many people would like to change something in their lives, but not everyone realizes their desires. Jesus said to his disciples: "Who among you, wanting to build a tower, will not sit first and calculate the cost, is it to finish?" (Luke 14:28). When the price is high and requires giving up certain things to which we are attached, we give up such a change. The price we are willing to pay depends on the importance of the change we are thinking about. Each of us has our own hierarchy of values, priorities that guide us when we make decisions. The higher is the priority, the higher is the price we are ready to pay. And higher priority results from greater desire. "Where is your treasure - your heart will be there" (Mt 6,21). What sets our priorities is what we store in our heart, which is what we love. It is love that guides our lives, and our decisions depend on what we love. There are different types of love, but Jesus said: "No one has greater love, like when someone lays down his life for his friends" (Jn 15:13). Such love is 'agape' love, consisting in total self-sacrifice for the good of those whom you love. The Bible also talks about 'fileo' love, friendly love that lacks an element of total self-sacrifice, and 'eros' love, which is sexual desire rather than true love. The Bible also speaks of a another kind of love, but in this case it hardly to use the word ‘love’, because this is self-love, selfishness. 'Agape' and 'fileo' are types of love based on giving, 'eros' and egoism are based on taking. True obedience to God is connected with love 'agape'. It is such obedience which basis is the desire to serve others in such a way as to bring them to God. A man obedient to God does not think about himself, but he wants to serve others with all his heart. "Love does not hurt a neighbor; therefore the law is fulfilling love"(Romans 13:10).

Our priorities depend on what kind of love fills our hearts, what we love, what is at the very top of our desires. The truth is that the more we love something, the easier it is for us to realize what is associated with this love. Even the biggest obstacles are not big enough to stop us from doing something that we really care about to do something that love drives us to do. And this is the key to becoming obedient. Obedience cannot be our goal because true obedience is the result of love for God. Focusing on obedience to God will never make us obey our Creator. But when we know God well enough to love Him, this love will fill our hearts, and obedience will appear without our will, it will automatically appear as a result of love.

What filled Balaam's heart? Perhaps for some part of his life there was love for God in him, but at one point it was repressed by love of the world's riches. His heart became selfish because he began to think about satisfying his own lusts. Egoism blinded him and took away his ability to rational and logical thinking. He succumbed to the temptations suggested to him by Satan, and thus to Satan's deception. King David said of such people: “For the wicked boasts of his heart’s desire (...) He has said in his heart, ‘God has forgotten; He hides His face; He will never see’” (Ps 10,3.11). Can anyone who has met God believe that God will not notice? Or that he will forget something? Can such a person think that one can stand before God with a heart in which there is an attachment to something that does not come from God? "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God" (Matthew 5:8).

Did Balaam obey God? Am I obeying Him?